𝐏𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨 𝐏𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐖𝐚𝐭𝐜𝐡 𝐓𝐢𝐤𝐓𝐨𝐤

Several years ago, I had a neighbor call and say he needed help. He had hired someone to cut his field of hay, but their equipment didn’t work. So he asked if I could cut it with my equipment. I dropped what I was doing, headed over, and cut hay for him.

A couple of days later, he called again. He had started baling, but the baler he was using broke. He asked if he could use mine. I said sure, ran my baler over, and they got it hooked up to their tractor. I went about my business.

The next day, while they were finishing up, they called again and said, “Hey, come get your baler — it broke.”

So I headed over. My baler was parked, and it was broken. To be fair, it was built in the early 1970s.

I pulled it home, took the covers off, and started looking at what was broken. After a little searching online, I found the part I needed. The manufacturer wanted $444 for it. I remember that number clearly.

While I was working on it, I made a short TikTok video. I talked about how my neighbor had needed help, and how that’s just what neighbors do. I mentioned the $444 part, and wrapped up the video by saying, “The part broke, but I helped a neighbor; and that’s what neighbors do.”

What I didn’t expect was for that video to make the rounds in the Amish community like it was an Oscar-winning film. I thought I had been vague and anonymous. Apparently not. The community figured out exactly who I was talking about. And even though my message was about doing the right thing, that neighbors help neighbors, the video embarrassed them.

That neighbor hasn’t spoken to me since. Even after I apologized for unintentionally embarrassing them, they won’t wave or acknowledge me when we pass on the road or see each other at events.

There are a few lessons in this.

First, nothing is anonymous on the internet. Even the Amish will find your TikTok videos.

But more important than that, even when you're being neighborly, you still need to stay neighborly. That doesn’t stop when relationships get uncomfortable. It means showing up, being kind, and being willing to help, even after the side-eyes and silence.

If that neighbor had a serious problem, I’d still show up.

With all the hate in the world, we don’t need more grudges. We need more neighbors.