𝐏𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨 𝐏𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐒𝐢𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐐𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

This morning, a haze of fog draped across the fields surrounding our backyard. The sun streamed through it, casting an almost otherworldly glow across the patio and landscaping. My coffee mug is filled with a new roast today, a bold brew that packs more punch than my usual Maxwell House.

Yesterday, a friend commented on my post, “𝘚𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘋𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘚𝘱𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘈𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥,”

and shared how he uses regular 1:1 meetings to help his team manage mental fatigue. What stuck with me was how he described those meetings.

In one part of his response, he said:

“𝘈𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘳, 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 1:1 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘺𝘦𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘪𝘵, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘢 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘭𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘵𝘴.”

Later in his message, he added:

“𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯: ‘𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩?”

Employee-led. Nothing off limits. That foundation jumped out at me. And that opening question, “What can I help you with?”, is a powerful signal of support and leadership.

It got me thinking: Why isn’t this the norm?

Why do we so often wait until annual review season, when tensions run high and conversations feel more like interrogations, to ask meaningful questions?

After 25 years in the industry, I’ve had more than one boss with the “you know your job, just do it” mindset. Even when I asked for regular conversations, I was met with silence, except at review time.

Now I see the cost of that silence: missed opportunities for support, wasted chances to problem-solve, and a lack of connection that hurts everyone — employee, manager, and the business.

We can talk about how these meetings help with mental health, offer space to understand challenges, and create room to celebrate wins. But for me, they simply show that the manager cares about being a leader, someone who is trying to get the best from their team.

As I reflected on my friend’s approach, I found myself asking what I’d say to someone who doesn’t get this kind of interaction from their manager. My answer was blunt: 𝑫𝒐 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒋𝒐𝒃 𝒘𝒆𝒍𝒍… 𝒃𝒖𝒕 𝒈𝒆𝒕 𝒐𝒖𝒕.

How have you been affected by regular, open communication with your boss? And if you’re in a leadership role, when was the last time you asked, “𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘐 𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘱 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩?”